This was watched because it looked like a cheesy mix between a vampire movie & Cocoon and because John Saxon always adds a touch of class to a movie. The trailer was that kind of uninspiring middle-of-the-road schleppy that can sometimes be the snuggly sci-fi horror blanket you need.
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Starting up another season of suffering through a horror movie franchise,, we watched the incredibly good Hellraiser.
Here’s our selected thoughts on it
And here’s our full watch-along commentary.
The full list of sessions is at the Paul & Andrew Watch All Of tab above, or here on Facebook, so please consider joining us for some deliciously painful fun.
There is a truth, often spoken uncontested, that Rawhead Rex is an utterly shitty film. Much like James Corden, it has become a byword for badly made, uninspired, and derivative trash. Thus, as a fan of all flavours of cinema (including the super-sour), I never bothered to track it down and only watched it because it was free, I had nothing specific to watch, and the algorithm spotlighted it for me. I was expecting a mild hate watch, and instead, I was just angry at all those who had pointlessly berated this perfectly acceptable film for internet points.
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Hey, anyone interested in an okayish mild-horror time filler designed to get everyone involved paid and some time on the SyFy Channel filled? Well, do I have a very middle-of-the-road bit of inoffensive tepid entertainment for you! Because much like the real world of bulk movie production, not everything you haven’t heard of can be joyfully bad or outrageously crazy. A lot of it just does the job it’s supposed to.
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It’s the mid-sixties, so whilst New Hollywood is being forged, Rock-&-Roll is tuning on to acid, and Vietnam is still considered winnable, there were kids’ movies to be made! In this case, with one of the stars and a number of the behind-the-scenes team from the outrageously popular Andy Griffiths show. It made crazy bank then, and secured a four-movie deal for those involved, but do the ghostly hijinks and gurning promised in the trailer hold up to today’s cynical psychotronic audience? Well…
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This had an enigmatic title, came from a noted Italian genre director, is being marketed under the normal quite crazy Shameless banner, and had a synopsis that sounded rather spicy. So as I was in the mood to try out something with a bit more European flavour than normal, and it didn’t look like yet another giallo slasher, it was worth a punt.
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The entire description blurb for this is “They Find a Live Wyvern in small-town Alaska.” It doesn’t explain who “they” are, the l is needlessly capitalised, and my expectations were set accordingly. Then, in the first two minutes, we get a caption telling us the icy landscape is Alaska, and then a CGI wyvern turns up. I can’t think of better expectation management in a creature feature. Continue reading
These two have nothing in common; other than I want to share them with you and they’re both under 15 minutes long.
Treevenge is a film that asks “Ever thought about how bad it would suck to be a tree during the Christmas season?” and then puts your mind through the woodchipper with aboral based gore. It’s in turn surprisingly evocative, brilliantly observational, and brutally childish. It also knows exactly how much mileage you can get out of its gag premise and goes not a second over what can be made from it. Then again, the final shot is in majestic bad-taste so I’ve no clue what could follow it up.
Watch it here
Noiseman Soundinsect “tells of the battle between the Noiseman monster that robs the people of music and controls the town, and the boys and girls who have been freed from the noise spells by the truth of music” and I’ve no means to say otherwise as it’s approach to narrative is “impressionistic”. What I can say is that it’s held me captive each time I’ve watched it and it’s a wild, colorful ride. It’s also only available below until the 17th of March 2023 so go watch now!
I may do more of these, I may not. Let me know in the comments or with your likes.
The Raggedyman
Because “Why not?”, and as it makes picking viewing easier, Trash Or Treasure is going through every movie in “Science Fiction – Double Feature”, the opening song for that trash culture classic The Rocky Horror Picture Show.
This week
Dana Andrews said prunes
Gave him the runes
And passing them used lots of skills
It’s American name is “Curse Of The Demon” so I’m not calling it that.
As is the tradition, the final movie of 2022 put through the Trash or Treasure group watching was the Christmas-themed low-budget shonk-fest with the craziest premise that could be found. This time we were promised monster elves, Nazis, and some chap called Dan Haggerty. There was also the prospect of impressive hairdos, because it’s from the late 80s and that Ozone Layer wasn’t going to massacre itself.
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Trash or Treasure 